How do you say a million things at once? How do you feel so incredibly humbled while your little world pats your back and strangers tip their hat? How do you crumble from exhaustion while your mind keeps racing? How do you say thank you and you're welcome to every one you talk to?
I have felt more emotions in the past 2 weeks than I have in a time span that I can recall. The depth of those emotions has brought much needed clarity.
We all want to be known and we all want to be loved. We put ourselves out there and hope someone takes notice. We pray that we're the story that gets people to move, think, feel, snap out of it. We daydream what it would be like to walk into a room and see glimmers of acceptance. We use that for our hope. We put all our effort in keeping our houses clean and smiles white...yet our houses are empty and we have absolutely no clue what makes our mouth naturally turn to the sky.
And then there is Willy. His energy. His smile. His ability to remember EVERYONE. His love for people that makes people flash back their pearly whites. This journey was what I could have only hoped for. I laugh that I wish I would have combed my hair and put on makeup...had I only known that the world would meet me by that picture. But then again...this was never about me. Somehow my heart got put on a big screen and I held my breath. There were no glimmers of acceptance. THERE WERE FIREWORKS. There was thunderous applause. There were people standing as if to say, "I see something bigger than myself and I want to be a part."
On the Crossroads team we are sacrificial givers, tireless workers, and obsessive includers. This venture screams why the truth is magnetic. People that read a story about someone they don't know donated money because it stirred their soul. I wish I could tell you all the stories I've heard in the past two weeks. Strangers pouring their hearts to me because I've become a safe place. And their generosity to me was one of the most humbling things I think I will ever encounter. Willie is the picture of a tireless worker. I took him home tonight after dinner. I may or may not have had a good cry as I realized just how far he pedals to sell those papers. On a broken bike. Lord forgive me for the unthankful parts that are too overwhelming to even look at. We don't strive for those things because it's trendy. We strive for them because it's what our hearts naturally long to hold on to. If you love Jesus or don't believe in His love for you...it's still down in there. Somewhere. This fund caught fire because we want to see good. We want to see it and we want to be a part of it. We want to fuel it.
Thank you. Everyone. This campaign has started so many sparks. Willie and I plan to meet every month for dinner. Maybe one day we'll invite the rest of the world. But for now...we have a friendship to foster.
You're doing great work. Keep going.